When things go wrong, you go right! Accept the "gift" of adversity through which God grows his children. Always remember "You are blessed!"

Bible Studies for Women

Daughters of Sarah: Wives of Great Worth

When things still go wrong

Some of us have done our best to be submissive, Godly wives, yet we've found ourselves groping in the rubble of a broken home. We trusted God. What went wrong?

God has a precious and tender answer for us:

"Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. Do not fear what they fear; do not be frightened" (1 Peter 3:13-14).

Can it be that even in what seems so wrong, "You are blessed"? Oh, yes!

When a woman faithfully follows the Lord in a troubled marriage, God walks daily with her. She is called to a great faith. As she trusts God day by day, she learns that he is faithful to that trust.

"For the LORD watches over the way of the righteous, but the way of the wicked will perish" (Psalm 1:6).

What greater opportunity to grow in faith than when the very foundation we've built our marriage on begins to crumble. What a comfort to know that even in this God watches over our way!

When a woman is faithful to the Lord, God will multiply that faithfulness back to her many times over. She will begin to experience continual joy and peace in the midst of the pain.

"And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus" (Philippians 4:7).

"You are blessed!" Peace and joy in the midst of suffering and a broken heart -- can there be any greater blessing than this? As we are faithful in a troubled and sometimes broken marriage, we learn of God's faithfulness as we could no other way.

"Therefore, since Christ suffered in his body, arm yourselves also with the same attitude, because he who has suffered in his body is done with sin. As a result, he does not live the rest of his earthly life for evil human desires, but rather for the will of God" (1 Peter 4:1-2).

Do not live for the things you desire (a beautiful marriage relationship.) Rather, live to fulfill the will of God for your life. God's desire is that your marriage be made whole. But his greater desire is that you experience continual trust in and fellowship with him. Live for that!

Rather than envy those who have "solid Christian marriages," begin to thank God for the blessings he has given you even in the painful times of your marriage. Remember, those "solid Christian marriages" have their struggles also.

Some of them are much more shaky than they appear from the outside. Others are strong, but none is perfect. In every one of those marriages you so envy, the wife is frustrated with her husband from time to time. He is sometines annoyed with her.

So do not envy. Rather be thankful for God's blessing in the marriage where you are. You are blessed!

"Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms" (1 Peter 4:10).

The Bible speaks of gifts of the spirit. But in the context of 1 Peter 4, could it be that the gift here is the gift of adversity? What greater gift can the Lord give than to make life hard so we learn to trust him?

As songwriter Andrae Crouch says in "Through it All": "For if I had never had a problem, I would never know that God could solve them, and I would never know what faith in his word could do."

How are we to use these gifts of suffering? By "faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms."

God will give you grace to live for him as you trust him through the heartbreak of a wayward child. God will give you grace to live for him as you hold his hand through the storm of a difficult marriage. God will give you grace to continue on for him as you experience the "gift" of feeling the marriage you've worked for crumble under your feet.

"Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed" (1 Peter 4:12-13).

This verse was written to a people who were suffering persecution for their faith. Ours is a different situation, but in a sense it is the same. Because of our commitment to the Lord Jesus Christ and to our husbands, we've lived for Christ in our marriages. Many have followed Christ even as their husband followed the world. Some have been the only Christian in their homes.

"So then, those who suffer according to God's will should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good" (1 Peter 4:19).

What do you do when things go wrong? When things go wrong, you go right! Be humble toward your mate, and be willing to admit your own weaknesses in the marriage. Give your husband to the Lord, and continue to trust God moment by moment.

"...clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because, 'God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.' Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

"And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast" (1 Peter 5:5-7, 10).

Always remember "You are blessed!"